[GZG] Completely OT

Sent to me....quite a good laugh.

WW1 described in terms as a bar fight:

Germany, Austria and Italy are standing together in the middle of the
bar-room, when Serbia bumps into Austria, and spills Austria's pint.
Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit, because there are splashes
on its trouser leg. Germany expresses its support for Austria's point of view.
Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit. Serbia points out that it
can't afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for cleaning Austria's trousers.
Russia and Serbia look at Austria. Austria asks Serbia who it's looking at.
Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone. Austria
inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so.
Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this
is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene. Britain
replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at
Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it? Germany tells Russia to
stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such
action. Britain and France ask Germany whether it's looking at Belgium. Turkey
and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey
makes a show of not looking at anyone. Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at
France, and punches Belgium. France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches
Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the
other. Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over.
Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it's on Britain's side,
but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria. Australia
punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings, because
Britain made Australia do it. France gets thrown through a plate glass window,
but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another
one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete
personality change. Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria
falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room
chanting. America waits till Germany is about to fall over, then walks over,
waves a fist at Germany while Britain knocks it out, then pretends it won the
fight all by itself. By now all the chairs are broken, and the big mirror over
the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the
first punch, so the whole thing is Germany's fault. While Germany is still
unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for
all their friends.

Nobody comes out of it looking particularly good.